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  • Batsheva Herzka

Don't Buy Your Daughter A Scale

And Other Tips on How to Not Sabotage Your Daughter’s Body Image


by Batsheva Herzka, RDN



1. Don’t compliment other people’s figures.

You to an acquaintance: “Wow, you got so slim! You look incredible!” Daughter thinks:

“Being slim is very important to looking great. I hope my mother thinks I am beautiful

even though I’m not as skinny as that person she complimented.”


2. Don’t kvetch about your own body.

You getting ready in the morning: “I look so fat! None of my clothing look normal on

me!” Daughter thinks: “If I’m not thin, clothing won’t look cute on!”


3. Don’t weigh your food.

You at dinner: “I’m allowed 2 carbs and 6 oz of protein. I’ll have 11 almonds as an

evening snack.” Daughter thinks: “there is a way to control the size of my body by

counting what I eat. It’s so normal, even my mom does it!”


4. Don’t link your food choices to weight.

You at a restaurant: “I’ll order the salad with dressing on the side because it’s really

much healthier and better on the hips.” Daughter thinks: “It must be super unhealthy

and fattening to eat pizza. I won’t order pizza even though I’m really in the mood for it.”


5. Don’t attach your fitness routines to weight and body shape.

You in your gym gear: “I must run out to my spin class. It helps keep my belly flat and my

thighs trim.” Daughter thinks: “My belly sticks out when I wear t-shirts. I really should

start going to the gym to get rid of the extra fat.”


6. Don’t connect food choices and morals.

You after a Chanuka party: “Ugh, I shouldn’t have eaten that donut. I was so bad on my

diet today.” Daughter thinks: “Good=salads. Bad= donuts.”


7. Oh, and of course, don’t buy your daughter a scale as a gift.

Just don’t. If you want to buy your daughter something special, she'll probably have plenty of other ideas for you. :)

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