Recalculating Recovery

If you’ve ever used a navigation app like Waze, you know the moment: you miss a turn, realize a little too late, and brace yourself for…what? A scolding? A lecture? A “How could you?”

But instead, Waze simply says: “Recalculating.” No judgment. No shame. Just a gentle redirection toward where you want to go. This small design choice offers a powerful lesson for eating disorder recovery.

People often imagine recovery as a clean, forward-moving trajectory: once you make the choice to get better, you should always move in that direction. But the reality is messy. Old thoughts can resurface. A tough day can knock you sideways. And when that happens, your mind often swoops in with harsh commentary:

“You messed up.” “You failed.”

Imagine instead responding the way Waze does, with a calm, neutral, “Recalculating.”

Instead of drama and self-punishment, you simply adjust your path and continue on.

One of the reasons recalculating is so helpful is that it interrupts shame. Shame is one of the biggest drivers of disordered behavior. When you replace shame with simple redirection, you enable compassion and your ability to develop resilience.

“Recalculating” doesn’t mean, “What you did was good,” nor does it mean, “It doesn’t matter.” It means, “You made a turn. Let’s find the next right one.”

Recalculating also normalizes detours. In navigation, missing a turn is expected. Roads change, traffic shifts, you get distracted...it happens! Recovery is similar. Your life circumstances change, stress increases, triggers appear, and unexpected things come up. It's essential to remember that a detour doesn’t negate all the miles you’ve already traveled.

The ability to recalculate keeps you focused on your destination. If a GPS gave up every time you made a mistake, no one would get anywhere.The recovery version of “destination” might be:

• peace with food

• freedom from compulsions

• kinder self-talk

• ability to nourish your body without guilt

Recalculating reminds you that these things remain possible, even after a misstep.

Last but not least, recalculating reinforces commitment rather than perfection. Eating disorder recovery is built on small, repeated choices. You don’t need to be flawless. You just need to keep going. As one of my mentors puts it, commitment is doing what you said you would do even in moments when you really don't want to do it. Every recalculation is a quiet recommitment.

Here are some practical ways to use the concept of recalculating in your daily recovery:

When a meal doesn't go as planned:

Instead of: “I blew it. I might as well spiral.”Try: “Recalculating. What’s the next helpful thing I can do?”Maybe it’s finishing your next scheduled snack. Maybe it’s texting your support person. Maybe it’s simply pausing to breathe.

When eating disorder thoughts get loud:

Instead of: “Ugh, why am I still thinking this?”

Try: “Recalculating. My thoughts are allowed to be there. I don't have to get stuck in them.

When old behaviors show up:

Instead of: “I’m back at square one.”

Try: “Recalculating. I know the way better than before.”

When motivation drops:

Instead of: “What’s wrong with me?

”Try: “Recalculating. What small action can I take next?”

Many people struggling with an eating disorder have a very loud inner critic. Sometimes it shows up as the eating disorder voice, and sometimes it's the voice telling you you're not doing recovery well enough. This is where harnessing your calm inner navigation system can help you heal. Just like your GPS doesn't expect perfect driving, don't expect perfect recovery. You’re allowed to miss turns, reroute, stop for fuel, or even pull over for help. The important part is that you stay on the journey.

Using the “recalculating" mindset can shift recovery from a rigid, all-or-nothing battle into a process of gentle course corrections. It also helps you practice powerful skills, such as flexibility and patience, that are very important in recovery. Keep calm and carry on!